Moths & Fireflies IV

The tide of breath began anew
Quivering replaced her still corpse-rest
She could not feel but did
Heavyness sat upon her lidded eyes
Light in instant-glows she knew
Through those translucent wings
Eye-lashed wings she could not use to fly
Joined in the movement denying death

The little-weight lifted from her face
And the pale twin moons appeared
Unveiled as curtain-clouds drew away
Returned and lifted again

Between her eyes and grey lined limbs
Appendages ice-dusted and nearly lit
The lights and grey winds weaved
More knots around those keeping her within

Void within her chest, memories and song
Bound with soul-knots, shards chained
A thousand threads pulled away
A thousand more retied in dance

Yellow-green sparks dropped to her
Did not burn or warm, they chilled
She let them light her legs, arms, emptiness
Sleep she longed, eyes too wide

Grey wings drew her gaze abroad
But their cloud grew deeper
Then all the wings seethed and boiled
Lightly they fell to clothe a void

Her legs gained strength, broke through frost
They drew up, clear of dark, white moss
Her ice-coated joints thawed with motion
The threads slipped back into the dark

Fingers met palms; claws, flesh
No tears, no blood, no pain released
Still tension gripped her limbs
Light and wings mingled in their dance

Lips, dry, ice cracked, and red
Tore apart, breath alone set free
Her voice was silent in void
Her song, her soul, her love its company

Her life was lost, brittle in the chill
Yet shakily her shoulders lifted
And she somehow rose on splintered legs
The lights fell upon her hair; wings, her skin

In a circle she turned with purpose
‘Till path to water, metal, glass she knew
A foot slid forward and resistant ice moved
Sunken holes, whitened, walked forward

Through razor-branches, unslowed, she ran
Gashes instantly covered by wings
Let not a drop mar the white
Of her skin, the snow, the cold, the void

At last, when lines would have clothed her
Had she not a gown of tattered grey
The limbs gave way to a shore
Of rock before snow lidded water

A line she walked upon the ice
Feet and legs lifting slightly up
Above stillest water’s white skin
Moving to the center slowly

The snow-floor collapsed beneath her
Down she plunged into the dead lake
Giving motion and waves to it
In her pocket of disturbance

Legs striving and arms sliding wild
She faced down to the dark below
Pushed and pulled against the waters
As they futilely forced her up

The liquid was long unnoticed
In her lungs as she gasped at last
Still she swam on resolutely
In the trail of small white bubbles

Her dark hair exploding backward
Was all that separated her
From the waters around her skin
All pale but for the burst of coal

Tension gone, all fluid motion
Thawing in the ice-cold blackness
Dropping as a long stone of quartz
To the bottom of emptiness

Her arms before her hit the earth
Breaking her fall and turning her
Around her center as she searched
The bottom for the truest blade

Her fingertips brushed the handle
Warmth crept up them to her knuckles
Then the cold flowed back like lightning
As she drifted and lost contact

One hand found and grasped the sharp blade
A red cloud swiftly covered both
Sharp heat swept up her hand and arm
Filling her body, limbs and mind

Flames lept over her shielded soul
Not breaking through the cold hard shell
Thawing her mind and deeper thoughts
Not breaking false threads or pain

The lights and grey wings pulled on threads
Lifting her to the light above
Slowly rising with the blade
Lifting heat with it beside her

Her head broke free of the water
A deep breath of air she drew in
Coughing and aching she floated
With thoughts of the one consuming

With Truth in hand she walked the path
Silently mouthing forgiveness
Surrounded by her green-grey cloud
Stepping straight through cutting branches

Inner swarm of revelations
Thoughts and pieces of memory
A storm quick-dancing in her mind
Each piece telling all she could be

Three types of tears flowed around her
Circling with each step she took
Cold white joining with her deep cloud
Wings and lights falling to her hair

White around her thickened, blinding
Ice-coating her gown of yellow-grey
Beneath the wings she felt nothing
A tempest of mind drawing in

Thoughts which she now feared forgetting
Collected on her mind’s blue walls
As the cloud did in her footsteps
While through the trees she sped onward

Silence, but for the wind, pushed her
Forward through the scratching branches
She raged, slow and ice-calm, deeper
With every thought fallen inside

Clothed in tattered, flowing strands
Hair, wings and coals deep-encapsuled
With the ice reflecting no light
Not from within nor from without

With every footfall she found truth
Melting the shards of memory
Collectng her mind and soul at last
Even as her feet slid through snow

Wings and sparks broke from threads and ice
Filling now empty air again
Her circling lights brightening
Lessening outer emptiness

The blade in her hand rising now
Lit with blue and drawing the sparks
Burning and absorbing them all
A soft torch lighting her old way

Her mind was filling with one thought
Of love, her unbroken promise
Wishing nothing more than return
To the comfort and completeness

From the blue she drew greater strength
Filling her limbs with like-fire
She burst into a heated run
Desperately parting the snow


“Moths & Fireflies” is a poem that I work on from time to time. I started it a few years ago and I’ve unfaithfully added to it each year since. It’s telling a part of the Frozen Truth from which I’ve taken my name on LJ, the net and in life to some extent… Someday I’ll have to tell it all. There’s no denying that, I’ll eventually get over my laziness and procrastination and do it.

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