I’ve expressed the trouble before, and it’s been unwaveringly cutting at my mind. I’m not happy with what I’m doing with my life in respect to my education. As my second year here at Dal is coming to a close I have finally decided to leave the school and take a year to figure things out and start saving a bit in my gypsy fund.
Computer Science isn’t what I want to have as a career. I didn’t realize it when I first enrolled here, but I don’t want to be a programmer. What interests me in computers is the communication and creative aspects, not what I am being taught. I’m not the sort of person who is comfortable in the sort of business environment that would also bring. I know I would not be happy with a job like that. If I’m not motivated in learning about it, why would I expect to be once I have a job in that field?
Is it running or quitting? No, it’s far from that. It’s finally accepting that this is not what I want to do with my life. It’s scary to be leaving the cage I placed myself in. That’s what university has felt like, honestly. Once you enroll you feel that you have to commit to the 4 years. I know now not to fall into that trap.
So, having made the decision I have a lot to do to make sure the next year will be constructive. In September I will need to find some sort of a full time job, even if it’s just a fast food place. I only need $500 a month to live well on. $350(for rent and all utils), $100 for food and $50 for phone. Extra money will be nice as well. 4 weeks/month x 5 days a week x 8 hours a day x 5 hourly take home pay = $800 a month. If I can get a job that will pay more than minimum wage I’ll be fine.
After that year I will hopefully have discovered what I want to do. I’m thinking of taking arts. I remember a month ago when I was talking to my English teacher from grade 12, Mr. Wirtannen, and he was really surprised that I wasn’t taking arts. He commented on how he thought I had a lot of talent at writing. That is something I really love doing, so perhaps I should take some writing courses somewhere? I have time to think it all over. No need to jump into anything like I did before.
After her next school year Ashley hopes to move here and attend a school in the Halifax area, possibly MSVU. If she can, that would be really wonderful. I can’t explain how happy I will be when we can finally live together. And if I could start at MSVU with her when she comes here that would be great as well.
Now, having made this big decision, I need to break it to my parents in the next few months, and get things in order over the summer. So much to think of, but my heart is already lighter.
I’m moving toward my future with caution and optimism. All aspects look like they’ll finally be moving towards happiness.
29 comments on “The Great Decision”
Good for you! So many people stay stuck in something they don’t want to do. I hope it brings nothing but the best for you!
Thank you. I’m confident it will.
That is a big decision, good luck!!
One of my professors told me that the ideal time in someone’s life is the 30s because they are established and don’t have to face the indecision of the 20s, I agree with him wholeheartedly.
Thanks.
I think that prof was quite right, but I’m honestly happy with everything other than school so the 20’s aren’t so bad for me, though they have just started… I’m only a few months into my third decade.
Min. wage in NS is $6/hour… so you can add a couple extra hundred dollars to that amount. 😉
Good choice though – if you’re not enjoying it, get out now. I actually spent my first year and a half in Computer Science before really realizing that I *hated* programming.
I was mostly being conservative in my estimates and considering taxes.
I don’t think it’s that I hate programming, because if I’m doing something creative or just challenging myself with some web-based programming I really enjoy it. It’s the way it is taught and the thought of using it in a business context that has really put me off.
Good luck with breaking the news to your parents! I hope this is the right decision for you. I was in a very similar situation. For nearly 2 years I was an English Major and I refused to admit to myself that this wasn’t what I wanted to do with my life. Finally, I decided to pursue my dreams instead of everyone else’s and now I’m in film school and I’m loving it. =) Just from your LJ, I can tell you’d be a terrific writer, and if that’s what you decide is right, I wish you the best of luck. Wow, a whole year to sort things out, that’s awesome. Enjoy it. =)
Thanks.
I’m glad you were able to find something you are happy to do. I hope I can say the same after the next year.
I’m always surprised that people think so much of my writing, for I just can’t see it. Maybe I should listen and should have listened before?
“We Are our Own Worst Critics People say I am good at lots of stuff that I don’t think I am the best at. I think it is human nature. Trust us you are a good writer, and I will buy anything you ever publish.
ok, so if I publish a hundred thousand books, with a print run of 1, you’ll buy them all and make me rich? O:)
I know you are good at lots of things, Sascha. Maybe we need to assassinate our internal critics?
thats such a brave thing to do..
parents can be so demanding…i wanted to take a year off to figure out what i wanted to do and they basically told me that i wasn’t allowed to..
*hugs*
minimum wage is only 5 dollars???? ours just got raised to like…7 something.. or was that 5 dollars after taxes?
*hugs*
I actually think my parents will be ok with it. And the bottom line is that this is what I am going to do and there’s not much they could do to oppose it or convince me that it’s wrong. I really believe they will be understanding.
Minimum is actually 6, but I was being conservative with my estimate.
always good to be conservative…i hate it when i over estimate and screw myself over..lol
thats good that your parents will be okay with it..mine said that they would when i was going through the whole applying to university process and not being able to decide where i wanted to go or what i wanted to do..
then they said that they thought that i woudln’t go back if i took a year off…which i totally wouldn’t do..but yeah..they can be so silly sometimes…
lol – i was thinking of moving to new brunswick to go to school just to get away from for a little while….lol
Why move to NB? Nova Scotia is where it’s all at, especially Halifax!
I’ll definitely go back to school, I just need to figure out what I want to do.
lol – my parents want me to go here…(ie. trent which is like…20ish minutes away) ick
one of my best friends () moved out there a couple years ago..and i miss him! lol thats why i would pick nb…
that and university of NB came to ontario offering automatic offers of admittance because we’re so fucked with the whole two graduating classes..icky icky..
My former roommate goes to Trent now. I think she’s a biology major.
Yeah, a lot of universities here are recruiting students from Ontario because of that mess.
cool cool…but biology – icky! i applied for a general arts program..history..social sciences…something of that sort..
mess is a the key word..and lucky me – i’m a gineau pig! ’cause they literally don’t know what they’re doing with all us grade 12’s…when i was in grade nine…my teacher had to teach us before the wrote the course…hehe…that was funny…
that sure does sound like a real mess
heheh – i accidently posted that before i finished! i’m so very…stupid today…
lol
so here’s the rest of my reply dealy:
figuring out what you want to do is important, if you don’t know what you want to do and end up doing something you hate, life wouldn’t be worth living…i’m glad that your going to take the time and energy to figure it out 🙂
thanks 🙂
I’m glad I finally have the guts to do that too.
wow, i just read that over and i really can’t type….lol…just ignore all the spelling/tying/gramatical errors in that…lol
I think you make the right choice — deciding NOW that you need a change, rather than deciding after you got your degree.
See, I’m realizing now that I have my degree I need to change fields. That’s why I’m so mysterious in my journal about my ‘back up plan’… I have a strong feeling that back up isn’t a back up at all, but will end up becoming my career path. However, breaking it to my family isn’t going to be easy…
As for your situation, it might help if I tell you that out of everyone I know from University, it is the ARTS students who have the most successful jobs. Honestly. 🙂 Everyone thinks its the science, comp sci, and engineers who have the best jobs, but that’s simply not true for people in their 20s, when its really hard to get a foot in the door at most companies. For example, one guy I know who has a BA in Political Science is in a sales job, making about 50-60K a year after you add on his comission. Another guy works for the National Post as a political writer… if you read the Post, you might have even read something by him, as he’s had a number of front page stories recently. Someone else I know with a BA works for the government in a tourism type job and makes good money at that. Meanwhile, almost everyone I know who went into computers either isn’t working in computers now, or is working a shit job they hate. Everyone I know who did my major, Biology and Physical geography, switched after they graduated. One girl went into teaching, another went on to do physiotherapy. Others went to do Masters programs or planned to travel and had no clue what they wanted for a job.
So yeah. End point of what I’m saying is that if your parents try to tell you some line like, ‘you’re throwing away your future, computers are where its at!’ you can tell them that’s BS. 😛
heh.
Oh yeah, one other thing: Just make sure you do go back. 🙂 I also know a number of people who keep saying they’re going to finish their degrees/go back to take new ones, but they never do. Give yourself a deadline or something so you’re more likely to stick to it.
There, I’ll shush now. 😉
lol I’ll go back for sure. Either I will return to school at the end of that one year or I will have somehow become rich and/or famous. 😉
Thanks for such a lengthy comment.
It was certainly encouraging…
I sincerely hope that you can find a career that will make you happy. I’ve accepted myself that my happiness will never lie with a career, but always elsewhere, with the people I care about and the things I do for enlightenment and not for money.
I think my parents will be ok with this all, just disapointed that I wasted their money and two years of my life(though I don’t completely see it like that, because I have learned a lot, it’s just more outside of class than inside).
I just realized (much to my horror) that I had not yet commented. I thought I did for some reason. Maybe it is the crack I am on 😉
anyway. I have a lot of admiration for you. That is a huge decision, one which many people never make, even if they should. Making this decision could not have been easy. But if it helps with the stress at all, I think it was the right thing for you to do.
Wirt is deffinatly right, taking arts would be a good thing, for photography or poetry or anything really. My suggestion is try a whole bunch of diffrent things, that way you get a taste for what is out there.
You deffinatly have my support in whatever you choose to do. I wouldn’t consider myself a firend (muchless a deciple;]) if I didn’t.
That really means a lot to me Sascha. I really think I have made the right choice.
I’m very thankful to have a friend as supportive as you.
Just catching up with my friend’s list now, and wanted to comment.
I think that if you’re absolutely sure you’re not happy with your current program, it’s an excellent decision you’re making. I went through the exact same predicament. I was originally in the journalism program at King’s. I thought I’d be a perfect fit there, and that I’d love the program – wrong. I hated it, and was very unhappy. I left, took a year off and worked full-time. While working, I took time to think about what I really wanted to do with my life and what type of education I’d need to get there. I got a LOT of negative comments about “dropping out”, and a lot of people thought I’d never go back. I did go back, the very next year, and next year I’ll be starting grad school: so much for never going back!
Leaving school for a year was one of the best choices I made. I hope it works just as well for you.
Thanks for leaving a comment.
I really am sure that I don’t want to continue with this program.
I know for sure that I will go back. I would just switch to a different program, but I don’t want to jump into anything like this again.
I’m sure I can handle any negative comments, but so far I’ve only had positive responses from my friends so I think most people will be supportive.
I really hope that this will work as well for me as your year off did for you.
Thanks.